A little bar humour

[Mac]

Was going to change a few names on this but I did not want to embarrass myself too much.

A drunk gets up from the bar and heads for the bathroom.
A few minutes later, a loud scream is heard from the bathroom.
A minute later another loud scream reverberates through the bar.
The bartender goes to the door to investigate why the drunk is screaming. "What's all the screaming about in there ? You're scaring the customers!"
"I'm just sitting here on the toilet and every time I try to flush, something comes up and squeezes my testicles."
With that, the bartender opens the door, looks in and says..."You idiot! You're sitting on the mop bucket!"

[plumber666]

This cowboy from Edmonton and his wife are visiting Vancouver, she wanted to go shopping so he said "You go ahead I'll go find a pub and have a couple of beers." So he walks out of his hotel on Davie Street and enters the first bar he sees and orders a beer. The place is pretty much empty so he sucks it back and has another one quick and steps into the washroom to take a leak before he heads back to the hotel.
The cowboy comes flyig out of the john all excited and says to the bartender, "What the Hell kind of place are you running here?!! There's a guy bent over the sink with a guy plugged into him, and a third guy plugged into the guy that's plugged into the first guy!!!"
The bartender asks him, "Did the guy in the middle have a red hat on?"
The cowboy says, "Yup."
The bartender says, "That's Mark. He's lucky at bingo too!"
Sorry for that.

[Sosua Gal]

Great one, mac- my Brother Shawn (plumber666) will appreciate your humor!!!
Colleen

mac said:

Was going to change a few names on this but I did not want to embarrass myself too much.

A drunk gets up from the bar and heads for the bathroom.
A few minutes later, a loud scream is heard from the bathroom.
A minute later another loud scream reverberates through the bar.
The bartender goes to the door to investigate why the drunk is screaming. "What's all the screaming about in there ? You're scaring the customers!"
"I'm just sitting here on the toilet and every time I try to flush, something comes up and squeezes my testicles."
With that, the bartender opens the door, looks in and says..."You idiot! You're sitting on the mop bucket!"