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Post by coppersun2001 on Sept 20, 2006 15:20:39 GMT -4
Butt Measurements
A man and his wife were working in their garden one day. The man looks
over at his wife bending over in the garden and says. "Your butt is
getting really big, I mean really big. I'll bet your butt is bigger than
the barbecue."
He proceeded to get a measuring tape, measured the grill and then went
over to where his wife was working and measured his wife's bottom.
"Yes," he announced victoriously, "I was right, your butt is 2" wider
than the barbecue!!!"
His wife chose to ignore him but filed his comment away on her female
hard drive..
Later that night in bed the husband was feeling a little frisky. He made
some advances towards his wife who completely brushed him off.
"What's wrong?" he asks.
She answers, "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-ass
grill for one little weenie?"
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Post by coppersun2001 on Oct 19, 2006 17:19:32 GMT -4
Dear Tide:
I am writing to say what an excellent product you have! I've used it all of my married life, as my Mom always told me it was the best.
Now that I am in my fifties I find it even better! In fact, about a month ago, I spilled some red wine on my new white blouse.
My inconsiderate and uncaring husband started to belittle me about how clumsy I was, and generally started becoming a pain in the neck.
One thing led to another and somehow I ended up with his blood on my new white blouse! I grabbed my bottle of Tide with bleach alternative, and to my surprise and satisfaction, all of the stains came out!
In fact, the stains came out so well the detectives who came by yesterday told me that the DNA tests on my blouse were negative and then my attorney called and said that I was no longer considered a suspect in the disappearance of my husband.
What a relief! Going through menopause is bad enough without being a murder suspect! I thank you, once again, for having a great product.
Well, gotta go, have to write to the Hefty bag people.
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